Englisch-Text korrigieren

Luna · Gast

hallo, ich muss nächste woche in englisch das hier abgeben. wäre nett, wenn sich das mal jemand durchlesen könnte und sagen könnte, wo da noch grammatikalische fehler sind!

Before he was accused of terrorizing the school Matt has a lot of friends. He was popular and they all liked him. With his closer friends Russ, Stacey and Skeet he worked out an one-act play of a short story by Edgar Allen Poe.
They spent a lot of time together and had fun. But I think this friendships were not really deep.
In this context I remember a proverb: True friends you recognize in misery.
That's absolutely matching because I think Matts friends betray him. If they would have been true friends they would stand beside him and support him, but they turn away from Matt.
And when Matt was suspended they didn't even call him by phone or sent him an e-mail.
For example Neil wrote back to him that he can't answer his e-mails because his dad forbade it!
Another reason that his friends betray him is that they didn't went to the principle to tell him that Matt was joking when he said he wants to blow up the school.
Maybe they feared that they could be involved in this accusations and they put up with the idea that Matt got in trouble.

ok das war jetzt ziemlich lang, ich hoffe es liest sich trotzdem mal jemand durch, denn meine englisch note hängt davon ab.

babelfish · Anmeldungsdatum: 20.03.2005 Beiträge: 41 Wohnort: hessen

Before he was accused schöner: before being accused of terrorizing the school Matt has had a lot of friends. He was popular and they all liked him. With his closer friends Russ, Stacey and Skeet he worked out an one-act play of a short story by Edgar Allen Poe. schöner: he worked out an one-act play of a short... with his closer friends...They spent a lot of time together and had fun. But I think this friendships were not really deep.
In this context I remember a proverb: True friends you recognize in misery.
That's in nem geschriebenen text benutzt man eigentlich keine "'", sondern schreibt das immer aus, also "that is". das wär zwar nich falsch, aber ne sache des stils! smile

absolutely matching because I think Matts Matt's friends betray him. If they would have been true friends they would stand beside him and support him, but they turn away from Matt.
And when Matt was suspended they didn't even call him by or sent him an e-mail. they did not even phone him or sent an e-mail
For example Neil wrote back to him that he can't wrote back to him that he could not answer - da die einleitung zur indirekten rede ("wrote back") in vergangenheit steht, wird bei der indirekten rede die zeit verändert. aus present wird past!answer his e-mails because his dad forbade had forbidden it!
Another reason reason heißt ja eigentlich grund; finde das passt hier nich so gut. besser: example! that his friends betray him is that they didn't did not went go to the principle to tell him that Matt was joking when he said he wants to blow up the school. that he wanted - wieder indirekte rede mit einleitung im past tense
Maybe they feared that they could be involved in this these accusations and they put up with the idea that Matt got would get (?!) in trouble.

Luna · Gast

ohhh danke danke danke danke danke Mit Zunge

ich weiß mein englisch ist miserabel

babelfish · Anmeldungsdatum: 20.03.2005 Beiträge: 41 Wohnort: hessen

kein problem! Augenzwinkern

sieht zwar jetzt viel korrigiert aus, ist aber eigentlich gar nicht sooo viel! smile

Gast

Habe leider noch einen kleinen Fehler in der Bearbeitung deines Texts gefunden. Möchte jetzt auch nicht besserwisserisch wirken oder so, aber ein kleiner Fehler hat sich doch eingeschlichen, nämlich:
But I think this friendships were not really deep.
Muss heißen: But I think these friendships were not really deep. Weil friendship im Plural steht. Oder du schreibst es im Singular, also But I think this friendship was not really deep.

babelfish · Anmeldungsdatum: 20.03.2005 Beiträge: 41 Wohnort: hessen

ist keinesfalls besserwisserisch! Augenzwinkern

dafür ist das board ja dann - und es kann ja schlecht jeder alles wissen! smile

also danke für die verbesserung! smile

Nicole · Gast

ich muss in der kinderpflegeschule ein englisches bilderbuch vorstellen. wär nett wenn das kurz wer probe lesen könnte. muss jetzt kein super perfktes englisch sein...nur ob es eben verständlich und eingermaßen grammatikalisch richtig ist...

Nicole · Gast

Hier der Text:

Today I would like to present a picture book.
What can you see on the book? (a pony, a bear and a apple tree) That’s right.

It’s also the title of the book – Pony, Bear and Apple Tree.
And what they sample I would like to tell you now.

- They look a long times for the apples. In this time they meet many animals which give them tips where the apples could be.

- They cross even the ocean.

- Then they start back for home. On their way home they give everyone who helped them to search/find the apples an apple in thanks.
___________________

The author of the book is Sigrid Heuck.

The book was published in 2003.

The picture book "Pony, Bear and Apple Tree" is written in Basic English for English learners.
There are simple sentences in extra bold type and a lot of pictures, which alleviate (erleichtern) the comprehension.

This book charms children in the age between 6 to 8 years.

It treats (einladen) English learners of the basic school to their first reading in English and make understanding easy while (indem) the nouns in the text replaced by pictures.
In the front of the book is a list which explains the pictures.

They will enjoy looking at the book because there are a lot of different situations and things and the pictures are colourful.

When the children look at this picture book they learn their first English words.

How can you use the book at work?
I would use the book in a kindergarten with a picture book presentation with 2 or 3 children, between 6 and 7 years old.
They would sit in a semicircle so that every child can see the pictures. Then I would read out the book and the children entitle (benennen) the pictures. After that every child knows new words.

I think it is a nice book for German children, to make their first steps in English language.

Now, I have a foil with a page from the book. One of you read it out and the others entitle the pictures.

Danke schonmal im vorraus

Gargy · Anmeldungsdatum: 25.05.2008 Beiträge: 62

Nicole · Gast

vielen dank smile

super dass des so schnell ging

Nicole · Gast

sampel soll soviel wie erleben heißen!!???

unten wollt ich eigentlich Hort (also grundschule und nicht kindergarten schreiben...) sorry

Nicole · Gast

while (indem) the nouns in the text replaced by pictures z.B. so: ... by replacing the nouns in the text by pictures.

bedeutet das dann auch soviel wie: indem die nomen im text durch bilder ersetzt wurden??

Gargy · Anmeldungsdatum: 25.05.2008 Beiträge: 62

MI · Administrator Anmeldungsdatum: 22.01.2005 Beiträge: 1140 Wohnort: München

Zum Kinderhort:
Schwierig. "Nursery" bzw. "Nursery school" ist eigentlich mehr die normale Vorschule/der normale Kindergarten. Ob der ganztägig ist, ist die Frage - aber insgesamt dürfte man verstehen, was mit "nursery" gemeint ist.

Aber andererseits bezeichnet "kindergarten" in den USA und Canada das erste Schuljahr oder die verpflichtende Vorschule und nicht - wie oft hier gelehrt - den Kindergarten. Von daher stimmt kindergarten auch schon irgendwie.

Gruß
MI

Nicole · Gast

ich hab für Hort bzw. Nachmittagsbetreuung in der grundschule after school child care gefunden. ich denk des passt so.

danke für eure hilfe smile

Gargy · Anmeldungsdatum: 25.05.2008 Beiträge: 62

Das klingt auch ganz gut und ist wohl unmissverständlich.

Nochmal kurz zur Diskussion: Laut Wiki ist the kindergarten freiwillig und immer den elementary schools angegliedert. Dort werden Grundkenntnisse in Lesen und Rechnen vermittelt. Ich schätze mal (weiß es nicht genau), sie lernen das Alphabet. Ob sie schon Bücher lesen?? Aber beim Vorlesen sind die Kinder bestimmt voller Begeisterung dabei Big Laugh

Hier mal zum Nachlesen.

Alexa15 · Anmeldungsdatum: 09.02.2010 Beiträge: 1

hey hoffentlich kann mir jemand heute noch ganz schnell helfen Augenzwinkern

ich schreibe morgen eine arbeit und bräuchte den text korrigiert Augenzwinkern

ich bin keine große leuchte in englisch muss man wissen Big Laugh

aber ich habe es versucht ... ich wäre euch sehr dankbar smile

lg :-*

I am very interested in your advertisement for the job in the newspaper ‘Bild’ on page 6 of the 1st October. I would like to apply for the position as a part- time sales assistant in your company. Supplementary details are in the copy of my CV.
I have studied at ‘ Lincoln university’ for three years and I will have finished one’s degree at November. I want to work as an assistant post-graduate. During the studies, I have worked as a sales assistant in an organic shop in Japan. This has given me experience of dealing with customers, as well as acquired skills and a basic knowledge of foot retailing. I am living in London since last September and my knowledge of English is very well. Every Thursday evening I give private tuition to a group of kids. This course is an exciting way to learn English. They are going to achieve progress. Through them, I have learned to keep calm ( endurance), be very reliable and determined. I am an enthusiastic worker and enjoy working in a team.
Besides, I work at the volunteer fire brigade and I trained myself in being trustful to my colleagues. I am very interested in ‘new challenges’. Which I could solve on the strength of my flexibility and adaptability fast and well. My student visa entities me to work up to 20 hours per week or longer during my school holidays and I could start work immediately.

I am confident that I can perform the job effectively and I would welcome the opportunity to discuss the job vacantly with your at an interview. I can be contacted most easily on my mobile phone or by e-mail see details at the top of this letter.

nicifra · Gast

Hallo, muss nächste Woche einen Vortrag über die News der Woche vom 1.2-8.2.2010 halten. Nun habe ich mir vier Themen herausgesucht. Habe sie versucht so gut wie möglich zu übersetzen. Hoffe jemand kann mir helfen und den Text für mich korregieren, da mein Englisch schlechter als schlecht ist. Vielen dank im Vorraus.

08.02.2010

Toter auf dem Feldberg
Zwei Tage nach einem Zusammenstoß auf einer Skipiste am Feldberg im Schwarzwald ist ein 28-jähriger Snowboardfahrer aus Belgien tot aufgefunden worden. Die Leiche des jungen Mannes wurde am Montag in einem abgelegenen Waldstück entdeckt. Der Snowboarder war am Samstag am Feldberg mit einer 13-jährigen Skifahrerin zusammengeprallt. Das Mädchen war durch den Zusammenstoß schwer verletzt worden und kam ins Krankenhaus . Der Snowboarder war geflüchtet. Nach angaben der Polizei war er bei dem Unfall stark betrunken

dead man on the Feldberg
Two days after a crash on a ski run on the Feldberg in the Schwarzwald a 28-year-old snowboarder from Belgium has been found dead. The body of the young man was discovered in a remote forest piece on Monday. The Snowboarder had crashed on Saturday on the Feldberg into a 13-year-old skier. The girl had become badly injured by the collision and came to the hospital. The Snowboarder had fled. According to informations of the police he had been drunked by the accident.

DFB Krise
Nach den geplatzten Vetragsverhandlungen zwischen der DfB Spitze und Jogi Löw sowie Oliver Bierhoff steckt der Deutsche Fußball in einer Krise. Bundestrainer Joachim Löw und Nationalmannschafts-Manager Oliver Bierhoff fordern eine hohe Bonuszahlung von 3 Mio Euro für einen neuen Zwei-Jahres-Vertrag. Außerdem soll Bierhoff ein Veto-Recht bei der Besetzung des Bundestrainer-Postens fordern. Der DFB lehnte die Forderungen jedoch bereits ab. Es bleibt abzuwarten wie der Streit sich weiter entwickelt.

German Football Association crisis
After the burst treaty negotiations between the DFB and Jogi Löw as well as Oliver Bierhoff the german football is in a big crisis. The Coach of the national team Joachim Löw and national team manager Oliver Bierhoff demand a high bonus payment from 3 Million € for a new two-year treaty. Moreover, Bierhoff should demand a veto power by the occupation of the coach of the national team post. Nevertheless, the German Football Association declined the allowance. Today it is not clear how the conflict developed.

Steuer CD
Die Bundesregierung will in den nächsten Tagen eine CD mit angeblichen Daten über Steuerhinterzieher aus der Schweiz kaufen. Sie sollen Geld auf Schweizer konten angelegt haben ohne dafür Stuer zu bezahlen. Die CD soll 2,5 Mio. € kosten und soll der Regierung etwa 400 Mio. € Steuernachzahlungen einbringen. Angeblich soll ein Mitarbeiter der HSBC in Genf die sensibelen Daten entdeckt haben. Falciani hat sich inzwischen nach Frankreich abgesetzt. Ob er wirklich in den deutschen Fall verwickelt ist, bleibt offen.
Tax CD
The Federal Government wants to buy during the next days a CD with supposed data about tax dodgers from Switzerland. They have to do money on Swiss accounts but without pay tax for it.The CD should cost 2.5 million € and should introduce about 400 million € of tax additional payments in the government. Supposedly an employee of the HSBC in Geneva should have discovered the important data. Falciani has retreated, in the meantime, to France. Whether he is really involved in the German case, stays open.

Verdi Streik
Nach Angaben der Tarifgemeinschaft Verdi beteiligten sich am Donnerstag den 4 Februar rund 22000 Beschäftigte des öffentlichen Dienstes an einem Streik. Müllabfuhr, Krankenschwestern sowie Kita Mitarbeiter legten ihre Arbeit nieder. Selbst in Freiburg fuhren 24 Stunden lang keine Straßenbahnen und Busse. Die Mitarbeiter des öffentlichen Dienstes fordern eine Lohnerhöhung von 5%. Darin sind neben Lohnerhöhung, die Fortsetzung von Altersteilzeitregelungen ein wichtiger Punkt. Noch wurde keine genaue Einigung gefunden.

According to informations of Verdi about 22000 employees of the civil service took part on Thursday 4th of February in a strike. Garbage disposal, nurses as well as Kita employee laid down her work. Even in Freiburg no streetcars and buses drove during 24 hours. The employees of the civil service demand a pay raise of 5%. Besides pay raise, the continuation of age partial time regulations is an important point. But today no exact arrangement was still foun

Tear16 · Gast

hallo also wir haben eine klassenarbeit geschrieben und ich muss eine Verbesserung von meinem Text schreiben, aber ich verstehe nicht was an meinen rot angestrichenen Sachen von meinem Lehre falsch ist. Wäre nett wenn ihr es mir sagen könntet:) alles unterstrichene ist falsch.

The text said that home schooling is one of the best things it gives.
The children mustn't go to school...
The children's knowledge could become stronger
The parents can choose what is important to know for the childs
... and this without so much money
if they would be teached at home they don't met other young people
when the kids say they haven't fun anymore the parents could say ok lets have a break
and the parents are to much inconsistent and they aren't strict enough

Wäre echt lieb, wenn ihr mir zeigen könntet was genau falsch ist :-***

Leni · Gast

Hallo, habe heute meinen ersten comment geschrieben, der auch gleich benotet wird. Die Aufabe lautet:
Write a comment stating your opinion on the following quotation: "Criminals love gun control - it makes their jobs safer." Explain the quotation, then say if you agree or disagree with the quotation!

Das ist mein Comment:

In the United States of America people have an individual right to own and carry weapons. It's called the „Right to keep and bear arms and refers to the Second Amendment of the United States Constitution, contained in the Bill of Rights.
In fact that there are 30,000 gun violence deaths in the USA each year, this right is very controversial. When discussing politics the topic of gun control is a hot debate.
Besides the quotation „Criminals love gun control - it makes their jobs safer“ comments on this topic. The following comment explains this quotation and states my opinion on it..
The explicit meaning of quotation is that all criminal people prefer gun control because then it is easier for them to do criminal things. It implies that gun control endangers people's life and does not protect it.
I agree with this quotation because I take the view that criminals are more successful due to gun control. For instance thieves don't have to care about their victims because most of them are not able to proteect themselves without a weapon. Furthermore rapists, murderer or other criminals only have to fear the police. There is no doubt that this makes criminals' jobs safe. Concluding I would like to refer that I agree with quotation indeed but I also believe that the state the quotation mentioned cpuld be prevented by the government. For instance with stricter gun controls.

Ist der so richtig?
Wäre sehr dankbar Fehler zu wissen, die ich gemacht hab oder sonstige Verbesserunsvorschläge zu bekommen!
Vielen Dank

KuschelHase · Gast

The Story “An American executive in London” is about cultural differences in relation to management and standard procedures in companies in relation to American and British ideals. The American executive in the story moved to London and has his own beliefs of being an executive and his own leading style. Therefore he has a standpoint because of his previous experience. He couldn’t understand the beliefs and procedures of the British company and wants to change the structure of the reception for visitors. The problem between the American executive and the British employees defines the beliefs of both related to the existing procedure of the reception for visitors. The American executive becomes annoyed by the long hierarchical procedure, which robs time because the visitors have to pass by a view positions in the companies hierarchy and were never sent directly to his office. That is why the American executive wants more flexible and uncomplicated procedure. He does not want such a strict hierarchical procedure for the reception of visitors. In contrast to the American executive the British employees are used to have hierarchical procedures in that content and it defines a standard in the British companies and in the beliefs of British employees. Therefore the British employees were very upset when the American executive talked to the British employees with the idea to change this practice of the reception of visitors.
The difference between the both parties could be found in the difference of the cultures and the habit of the management structures and procedures in the company.
This problem could be reflected with one of Geert Hofstedes dimensions of national culture. Hofstede defines as third point in his cultural dimensions the point, which is called uncertainty avoidance and is separated in high and low. This dimension deals with a society's tolerance for uncertainty and ambiguity. It indicates to what extent a culture programs its members to feel either uncomfortable or comfortable in unstructured situations. Uncertainty avoiding cultures try to minimize the possibility of unstructured situations by strict laws and rules. The opposite types, uncertainty accepting cultures, are more tolerant of situations different from what they are used to. They try to have as few rules as possible and not those strict procedures.
The American executive is not accustomed to such a long hierarchic practice and wanted to change that practice according to his beliefs and experience without knowing that this hierarchic procedure defines a standard in Britain. Equally the British employees are used to that strict hierarchical practice and want to save it.
The story “An American executive in London” shows the different cultural beliefs and beliefs and how a little practice can create significant problems in business culture.