erörterung, kann mal bitte jemand korrekturlesen??

mo · Anmeldungsdatum: 24.04.2006 Beiträge: 10 Wohnort: Frankfurt (Oder)

THE COLOR GAME-A GAME WHAT CHANGE PEOPLE

The color game is a game what change definitly the ideologie of the people who play it.
In the following text I will discuss the thesis but at first I want to give you some impressions of the rules of the color game.

In this game, the students are splitted in four social classes which are represented by armbands.
The highest of these colors is blue and upper class wear it, dark green is the upper middle class, light green is the lower-middle class and at least the lowest color is orange.
To further split up the classes, there are the superior sex, Teks(females), and the inferior sex, No-Teks(males) they record the students’ activities, and record any good or bad behavior, which can result in demotions or promotions. The Color Game runs like this: Lower classes, or No-Teks, must bow when they meet eyes with a higher class, or Tek. Higher classes can give orders to lower classes. Lower classes may not speak to a higher class unless spoken to, and can only reply in a short answer. You must have your armband and journal with you at all times.

I want to give an example, in the book you can find the character of Paul Thomas.
Paul Thomas is a student and he is also in the same class like Adam and Amy.
In Chapter 3 (page 25, line 21) it`s said about him, that he always sit where Otero
can`t see him. It`s seems that he is a kind of timid.
In Chapter 7 this is changed, his charakter is pumped up by his new sozial status. In the way how he act you can see that he have much more self-confidence then in the 3th Chapter.
Another receipt you can read on page 105, line 18. In this line is written that he grinned with pleasure at them. It`s the situation when the male beauty contest happened. So his charakter has changed. In Chapter 3 he was the timid boy who is frightend of his teacher and that he could blame himself, and what`s now? He stand there in the mid of a lot of girls, show them his body and have and grinned and is pleasure.
At the end of my reasoning I want to cite himself, at page 58, line 33 he repead the words of his English teacher, she said: “Paul Thomas, what got into you? You`ve been quiet as a mouse all term and all of a sudden you`ve got opinions.”
What`s more can you say about a changing character.

In my opinion the color game not just change Paul, it have changed all of them.
Each of them in his way.

Ist das so okay??? für eine erörterung?