Referatkorrektur

Gast · Gast

Today, I want to tell you what happened during my week from Friday 16th to Thursday 22nd.
As I hadn't got time to watch news, I can't tell you a lot about politics or the latest events.
Now have to tell you something about my week.
On Friday, I was very glad that school was over. In the afternoon, my boyfriend and I decided to go to Regensburg to buy Christmas presents. (Bild) In the shopping center, we met two friends of ours. After having bought the last two presents five minutes to eight, we were very hungry and therefore, we met with our friends and went to a restaurant.
On Saturday, we and a few acquaintances of us went to the Christkindlesmarkt of Nuremberg by train. (Bilder) Arriving at the Christkindlesmarkt, we immediately bought original "Nürnberger im Weckle". Later, and still hungry, we went to a restaurant, which was called "Das kleine Brauhaus", but which wasn't really little. (Bild)
On the way home, we all were really whacked and tired. (Bild)
On Sunday, I finally began to revise for economy and my mood became very bad because the weekend was over.
Unfortunately, I can't tell you a lot about the rest of my week, because I spent most of my time eihter in learning or at school.
But on Tuesday, our art class visited the Otto-Dix-exhibit in Regensburg.
Otto Dix was a German expressionist and anti-war painter and a veteran of the First World War.
In 1891, he was born in Untermhaus in Germany.
When World War I began, Dix enthusiastically volunteered for the German Army. During the war, he was seriously wounded several times. During the Nazi-time, his pictures were forbidden and later even burned, because they showed the terror of World War I.
After the war most of his paintings were religious allegories or depictions of post-war suffering. (Bild)
Dix's material was extremely critical of contemporary German society what he tried to express in pictures like "Lustmord". (Bild)
In my opinion, Dix's picutres are a bit pervers and need to get used to, as you can see here. (Bild)
Dix died in Singen in 1969.
Concludingly, I can say that this week was interesting, but also very stressful and therefore, I'm now looking forward to Christmas Eve and our vacation, because then, two friends and I are going to learn snwoboarding. (Bild)

Bitte schauts euch vor allem meine satzstellung an ;-) oder überhaupt alles... DANKE

Gast

Ein paar Sachen...:

"Now have to tell you something about my week. " : Es fehlt das Subjekt - "I"

"After having bought the last two presents......": 'After having bought' ist etwas umständlich - lass einfach das "after" weg, der Sinn bleibt erhalten.

"On Saturday, we and a few acquaintances of us....": Ich glaube, hier muss es heissen, ... "a few acquaintances of ours" d.h. man braucht das Possesivpronomen.

"Arriving at the Christkindlesmarkt, we immediately bought original "Nürnberger im Weckle" ":
Obwohl ich mir nicht sicher bin, ob man das Partizip Präsens "arriving" so verwenden kann, kann ich sagen, dass sich "When we arrived ..." auf jeden Fall besser anhört.

"On the way home, we all were really whacked and tired" : whacked und tired sind Synonyme, also entscheide dich für eines.

"my mood became very bad": Gefühlsmässig würde ich sagen, dass stimmt so nicht, bin mir aber nicht sicher. Vielleicht ist "my mood grew worse" ein Alternative.

So, meine Energie ist erst einmal am Ende. Hoffe, das hilft (tut mir leid, wenn ich pingelig war... )