letter of motivation ;/

stefanpefan · Anmeldungsdatum: 13.05.2011 Beiträge: 1

Hi kann mir jemand mal bitte den LoM korrektur lesen, ich habe das gefühl er ist voller fehler x_X
wäre sehr sehr nett.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I hereby wish to state my interest for a place in your Bachelor of Science program in International Business.

Concerning my future career I intend to achieve the Bachelor of Science. I would like to gain international business knowledge in order to work in an international company such as a investment bank.

In order to achieve this goal sufficient academic qualification regarding business knowledge, language skills and the ability to work in a team are required.

Several months ago, I found out about Maastricht University in Canada because of a dutch friend. He highly recommended to me the accredited Faculty of Economics and Business Administration at the University of Maastricht. Therefore he gave me the current study program. I felt very confident that this will provide all the aspects I listed above in a very good manner.

So I decided to visit Maastricht after I got home from Canada. I have to say that I really felt attached to Maastricht because of the affinity to my native city Dresden.
I always wanted to study in rather a small and compact city like Maastricht because I like to have close contact with my fellow students.

Another reason for applying to Maastricht University is that I would like to study abroad in order to get in contact with other students from foreign countries and cultures, and to face the challenge to work with them in teams. I already had the opportunity to live abroad and really appreciated it.
Furthermore I am very attracted by the “Problem-Based Learning” system. “Problem-Based Learning” combines gaining soft skills and academic knowledge.

I early recognized the importance of communication and economies so I decided to go to an academic high school, which is specialised in economies. In fact of that I gained - we mainly worked in groups in our courses - the necessary skills for productive teamwork and learned a lot of the importance of foreign cultures and mentalities in the global developments for the last four years.

In 2009 I spent four weeks abroad in Watertown, South Dakota. It was a student exchange program. These exchange weeks helped me to improve my English skills, made me more mature and awaked the wish to learn to visit the USA again.
The dream came true. So I applied for an 'Work and Travel Visa Canada'. During my stay I gained a lot experience of being a team leader in a fast paced company called 'Bear Country Lodging Sun Peaks', met significant people and travelled with a couple of them all across the USA after the winter season.

My orientation towards team-work is supported by my hobbies. I used to play soccer for eight years. During my school time I was always a part of the basketball and volleyball club. I also have been a class representative and always appreciated it. Moreover all these aspects allow me to be a helpful team member and even a good team leader, what I had shown in Canada.

As a result, I will be a highly motivated, international, social and team-orientated student. I want to play an active role in order to make the best of the excellent opportunities that the University of Maastricht offers.

I am well aware of the fact that I actually need an TOEFL certificate, but due to the English knowledge that I gained in the 'Work and Travel' expierence such a certificate is manageable. However, I already fixed an appointment to take the test in Berlin, soon.

Thank you very much for considering my request.
I hope to get the opportunity to hear from you soon.

Yours sincerely
xxx

MI · Administrator Anmeldungsdatum: 22.01.2005 Beiträge: 1140 Wohnort: München

Rot=Fehler
Orange=Bin ich nicht ganz sicher, hört sich in meiner Version aber auf jeden Fall besser an
Grün=Vorschlag

Insgesamt aber klares Englisch, es gibt eher Kleinigkeiten, die mir aufgefallen sind.

Gruß
MI

stefanpefan. · Gast

danke du bist mein held für heute Big Laugh

und rettest meinen tag