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[quote="Keyo"]Da muss ich wohl fleißig weiter üben. Es haben sich auch einige tastaturfehler eingeschlichen wie ich sehe. :hammer: Danke schön.[/quote]
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MI
Verfasst am: 22. Sep 2007 11:00
Titel: Re: Essay-Korrekturlesung
Goldenhind hat Folgendes geschrieben:
Environment Pollution!
The
goods
you can buy in shops, supermarkets,
(and)
toy shops are very often
packaged in too
much plastic.
Plastic is a
material
which
is not well recyclable
. To produce plastic
factories
- du meinst sicherlich "Fabriken", oder?
have to shoot
"shoot" ist sicher nicht der richtige Ausdruck, ich würde "emit" sagen, aber dann ist das mit "emission" doppelt gemoppelt
very much emission in the air.
As
wirklich "While"="Während"? Das passt nicht zum "but". Ich glaube eher du meinst "because/as"="weil"
plastic
is not
recyclable we bring it to
rubbish
dumps, but what should they
wer ist "they"? wenn du das nicht definierst, ist das Umgangssprache
do with it there?
After some time they
burn it
ohne "up" klingt's besser...
because the rubbish dumps need place for the
newly
incoming waste.
You
cannot
burn everything so the rubbish dumps get bigger and bigger. The ozone hole
gets bigger, too
. It is a
vicious circle (Teufelskreis)
.
What can
you
do to stop this
circle
?
I give an example. When you go to a butcher you can
package
the meat into a tupper ware. This is just one thing but it would
already improve the situation very much
"bring so much" ist mMn German-English
.
What can you do to save the environment?
If you live near
to
obwohl ich öfters mal "by" lese, meine ich, dass die Präposition eher "to" sein MÜSSTE, ich mag mich hier aber auch irren.
your workplace you could take the bus or trailway.
When you just want to buy cigarettes or else you could go for a walk and
leave
the car in the garage.
You
can try not to produce
das mit "you can look that" mutet ebenfalls sehr "Deutsch" an, könnte aber dennoch gehen...
so much waste.
Buy a low emission car when you need a new car and you have the money for it.
The most important thing is to practice waste seperation.
Hier noch ein paar Zusätze zum zweiten Teil.
Keyo
Verfasst am: 20. Sep 2007 19:10
Titel:
Da muss ich wohl fleißig weiter üben. Es haben sich auch einige tastaturfehler eingeschlichen wie ich sehe.
Danke schön.
Goldenhind
Verfasst am: 20. Sep 2007 17:06
Titel: Re: Essay-Korrekturlesung
Keyo hat Folgendes geschrieben:
To save the
health of people
the government has to reform the politics
(evtl. besser "policy" wenn du konkrete Maßnahmen meinst
of smoking. In the fumes of
cigarettes academics
found hundreds of toxins.
Some of the toxins are carcinogen. Smokers and non-smokers know that
for
a lot of years. The government did
not do anything
about it.
We got more carcinogen patients,
among whom are (a lot of) smokers or ex-smokers
, in the last 10 years
vermutlich besser: "who stopped smoking within the last 10 years"
so the government has to reform.
It
is not
okay that little children or people who
do not
smoke breathe in the fumes of cigarettes and get ill.
They have the right to go into a pub
so
the government must enclose
was meinst du hier mit "enclose"?
smoking and non smoking zones.
I think it
is not
okay to
ban smoking
everywhere because grown-up people have the right to do with
their own lives
what they want
(to do)
but for the reason of health
die Formulierung gefällt mir nicht
of the other people they should limit
their
smoking acts in public places. [157 words ]
Environment Pollution!
The
goods
you can buy in shops, supermarkets,
(and)
toy shops are very often
packaged in too
much plastic.
Plastic is a
material
which
is not well recyclable
. To produce plastic fabrics have to shoot
"shoot" ist sicher nicht der richtige Ausdruck, ich würde "emit" sagen, aber dann ist das mit "emission" doppelt gemoppelt
very much emission in the air.
While plastic
is not
recyclable we bring it to
rubbish
dumps, but what should they
wer ist "they"? wenn du das nicht definierst, ist das Umgangssprache
do with it there?
After some time they burn it up because the rubbish dumps need place for the
newly
incoming waste.
You
cannot
burn everything so the rubbish dumps get bigger and bigger. The ozone hole
gets bigger, too
. It is a
vicious circle (Teufelskreis)
.
What can
you
do to stop this
circle
?
I give an example. When you go to a butcher you can
package
the meat into a tupper ware. This is just one thing but it would bring so much.
What can you do to save the environment?
If you live near by your workplace you could take the bus or trailway.
When you just want to buy cigarettes or else you could go for a walk and
leave
the car in the garage.
You can look that you produce not so much waste.
Buy a low emission car when you need a new car and you have the money for it.
The most important thing is to practice waste seperation.
MfG Goldenhind
Keyo
Verfasst am: 20. Sep 2007 11:53
Titel: Essay-Korrekturlesung
HI!
Ich bin nicht gerade ein Genie in Englisch. Deshalb bitte ich um eine kurze Korrekturlesung meiner 2 Aufsätze.
Hauptprobleme: Satzstellungen und Phrasen aus dem Wörterbuch.
Smoking in Pubs!
To save the healt of peopöe the government has to reform the politics of smoking. In the fumes of cigarettes the academics found hundreds of toxins.
Some of the toxins are carcinogen. Smokers and non-smokers know that since a lot of years. The government did nothing about it.
We got more carcinogen patients, within much of them are smokers or ex-smokers, in the last 10 years so the government has to reform.
It isn´t okay that little children or people who doesn´t smoke breathe in the fumes of cigarettes and get ill.
They have the right to go into a pub sp the government must enclose smoking and non smoking zones.
I think it isn´t okay to ban the smoking everywhere because grown-up people have the right to do with theyr own life what they want
but for the reason of health of the other people they should limit theyr smoking acts in public places. [157 words ]
Environment Pollution!
The articles you can buy in shops, supermarkets, toy shops are very often inpackaged in to much plastic.
Plastic is a stuff which isn´t good recycleable. To produce plastic fabrics have to shoot very much emission in the air.
While plastic isn´t recycleable we bring it to rubish dumps, but what should they do with it there?
After some time they burn it up because the rubbish dumps need place for the new incoming waste.
You can´t burn everything so the rubbish dumps get bigger and bigger. The ozone hole get bigger too. It is an awful circulation.
What can you do to stop this circulation?
I give an example. When you go to a butcher you can inpackage the meat into a tupper ware. This is just one thing but it would bring so much.
What can you do to save the environment?
If you live near by your workplace you could take the bus or trailway.
When you just want to buy cigarettes or else you could go for a walk and let the car in the garage.
You can look that you produce not so much waste.
Buy a low emission car when you need a new car and you have the money for it.
The most important thing is to practice waste seperation.
Ich danke im vorraus für eure Hilfe und entschuldige mich für sämtliche "Anfängerfehler".